“I was never taught anything”
March 13, 2023
It took Geraghty four years to receive an official ADHD diagnosis, along with diagnoses of anxiety and depression. It wasn’t until her cry for help in 2020 that people began to take her seriously.
“It was a four year long battle with teachers and administrators to get the 504 plan and get the accommodations. And that’s disheartening. It doesn’t feel good,” Geraghty said. “Every time I was asking for help, or looking for help, there was none to find.”
Without a diagnosis or a support system to validate her feelings, Geragthy bottled them up. When she finally spoke to a psychiatrist in 2022, the psychiatrist made her buy an “American Girl Doll: The Feelings” book in order to help her find the words for her feelings.
“These are childish things, but I never learned those things,” Geraghty said. “I was never taught anything about that. So I’m a senior in high school, and learning how to pinpoint which emotion I’m feeling on a printed, laminated card.”
Notably, respondents to the B’s survey said that mental health is no longer shrouded in stigma. But for students like Geraghty and Saunders, that doesn’t always make talking about it easier.
“It’s a harder topic to bring up, even when you know your parents would be 100% supportive and your friends will be supportive,” said Saunders, who hasn’t told her family about her mental health struggles. “Especially being a people pleaser. It’s like I don’t want to add stress to anyone else.”
Although many students at Burlingame share similar mental health experiences, Gong said others refuse to empathize with their peers, choosing snide remarks over sympathy. Gong, for one, doesn’t let them get away with it.
“I actually say it directly to their face,” Gong said. “I kind of just laugh and say, ‘Oh, you’re so ignorant and privileged.’ And then maybe think more of our perspective.”
To describe existing mental health stigma, Fleming referenced a lyric from “Fill in the Blank” by Car Seat Headrest: “you have no right to be depressed.” At times, Fleming said, she still has to remind herself that depression does not need to be proved to anyone — and that happiness and depression aren’t mutually exclusive.
“It wasn’t just awful. There were lots of times when I was having fun and I was still depressed, and I still had a lot of these feelings,” Fleming said. “Honestly, I wouldn’t change anything that happened to me because it shaped the person that I am now. But I would not wish it on anyone else.”
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